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Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Tired.

I seem to be in a rut. 

Some days I feel like I'm always trying so hard to be the best Mom, wife, friend, daughter....the list is endless. But most days I feel like I can barely keep my head above the water. I know I'm not alone. But jeez I swear when you have babies no one tells you how hard it really is. To make the ends connect. It's hard. Is it worth it? Yes. It 100% is. 

But sometimes I lose myself. Which makes me feel so out of control or lost. Or short tempered with everyone. Becoming a mom is such a wonderful and challenging job. It's by far the hardest job I've had. Would I do it again? Absolutely. No one tells you about seeing your son hit the ball for the first time...or your daughter in a beautiful gown walking down the aisle with her bouncy curls and flower girl basket.

I'm so guilty of saying oh you just wait until they are fighting to new moms of 2. Or something similar..why don't I tell them how mine are best friends and the first time you see it happen it makes you cry? And they are always looking for each other? How I'm amazed by their bond? And envious of not having my own sibling. 

From this day forward I'm starting over. I can do that right? I vow to stop being pretentious and start living one day at a time. And try my best. My very best. I may not be super mom, a fabulous wife, best friend I should be or daughter of the year...but I'm me. And that's enough. Take me or leave me. But my best is always good enough. If you made it this far thanks for listening to my rant. 

Tomorrow's a new day.






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